Tuesday, October 14, 2025

The Most Stupendous Epic Adventure Continues

 


We left the J Bar B Dude Ranch and started to head east for our epic adventure. It was imperative that we did leave to save our livers, even though Bambi begged and pleaded for us to stay it was time. 9 days was a lot of time spent together and in the background I could see Jethro starting to load his shotgun. Yep, it was time.

Our next destination was going to be Omaha, Nebraska. Did you know that Omaha has the country's best zoo? Or as I like to call them, animal prisons. We made a stop in Mitchell, SD because we detest driving farther than 400 miles in a day. It was going to be about 350 miles which gives us a nice break. Once we got set up at the Mitchell city park campground, it gave us time to reflect on the past week and to also kill the many stink bugs that have infiltrated our camper. They are not really stink bugs. They are the Western Conifer Seed Bug.

The reason that they are mistaken for a stink bug is because when you squish them they emit a foul odor. They were everywhere. They fly into your face and hair so you can't help but not swat at them.

Reflecting on the past week we learned that for Jethro, it's never too early to start drinking. Bambi is an excellent cook. Her feasts reminded me of the time Gladys and I went to a medieval dinner theater. The portions were heaping and the alcohol was nonstop. 

The next day we headed out to Omaha but we had to make a short stop at a grocery store. As a going away gift from Bambi, she gave me her cold. So I needed lots of cold medications for the rest of the trip. We got to Omaha and stayed at a campground we first stayed at when we hit the road back in 2014. It sure had changed because none of it looked that familiar. In fact I thought it was someplace totally different. Oh well. 

We got set up, killed more bugs and got ready for the zoo.

The zoo is enormous. It's a good thing I got in shape doing those death marches in SD with my boot on. I turned on my pedometer app on my phone and we were off. The animal areas are big and the animals have room to roam around which is good.
Lemurs.
Silver back gorillas.

Jellyfish.

More Jellyfish.

Sleepy Lions.

Snow Leopard.

Rhino.

We were at the zoo on a Tuesday so it was not crowded at all. We made it around the entire zoo and I was getting very tired of hobbling around in my boot. In fact my legs were starting to kill me so we finally made it to the exit. I looked at my pedometer app and it said that we had walked 3.5 miles. No wonder my legs were killing me.

I got a message from my security guy at the SSUVFL. He said that he met my daughter and they were going to run off together leaving the SSUVFL unprotected.

Now that creates a problem. Do we continue South on our epic adventure? We know Bambi is tracking us because we get messages from her telling us not to turn north. The Google says that we are only 413 miles from home. We could break the 400 mile rule and turn north. My foot hurts so bad that I couldn't enjoy walking on sandy beaches right now. Plus the SSUVFL is unprotected.

With all of the evidence in front of us there was only one thing to do.





Sunday, October 5, 2025

Final Days at the J Bar B Ranch

 Friday 26 September 2025

Jethro has been saving the biggest and best events for the finale of the first annual "J Bar B Ranch get together and hootinanny. (Jethro, you might have to work on that name. Just saying.) Although our group of the original ten is shrinking a little bit now. Debbie flew out on Thursday and Dave and Leslie are leaving Friday. So that leaves 7 hearty souls to continue on.

The first big event was touted as being enormous. It was going to be the 60th Annual Buffalo Round-up at Custer State Park. Jethro said that we had to leave the ranch at 6:30 in the morning. The plan was to take Jethros pickup camper and then meet up with some of his friends and then convoy into the park with them since this was everyone's first rodeo to speak. 

We drove to the town of Custer to meet his friends and then it was a long 2 hour drive into the park to the viewing area. Normally it would not be such a long drive but can you imagine 20 thousand people all wanting to go to the same area all at once. Instant gridlock traffic. Stop and go for hours. What made it worse was having my morning coffee filling up my bladder. Not a fun drive at all.

We eventually made it to the parking lot and thank the maker there was a porta potty pretty close. A sigh of relief could be heard all across the park. Jethro's friends set up tables and chairs for having some breakfast and drinks. (Go figure.) Mimosas, Bloody Mary's and Screwdrivers. We relaxed a little until it was time to take a shuttle bus to the viewing areas. Once there we walked through a sea of humanity to find the perfect spot to see the buffalo come in. The group quickly threaded themselves through the crowd leaving the two cripples behind as usual. So Harry and myself were left standing on a different hillside. We stood there for an hour waiting.

A crowd of people.

More people.

And more people. Across the way was another viewing area and the spot circled is where the SD Governor was watching.

I really never thought in my entire life that I would be sitting on a hillside with 20 thousand other people trying to get a glimpse at a herd of buffalo, but here I was. In fact on our way to the black hills we passed two big herds of buffalo just west of Pierre SD. Just standing by the road as we drove by.
This is what I remember of the buffalo round-up.


Finally they were herded past the throngs of people as cheers erupted for the buffalo. (Not kidding about that).

The cowboys herded the buffalo around that far hill and into a pasture just below us. It took 15 minutes. Now 20 thousand people were all wanting to leave at the same time. So we went back to the campers and here is the brilliant part. We sat around and had lunch and cocktails until the crowds finally started to thin out. We then packed into the RV and started the two hour drive back home. There was a big vendor show that we stopped at to look around. We found more people there.

Tired, we piled back into the RV and headed back to the ranch. Alcohol was provided in hopes of perking people up again but it was a rather long day. Harry and Vicki were leaving in the morning which meant there were only 5 left now. Also there was some confusion about when checkout actually was. Jethro was saying that it was Saturday but then Bambi wanted us to stay another week. Steve was leaving on Sunday?

Saturday 27 September 2025

Harry and Vicki were packing up to leave that morning. Jethro was running around telling the rest of us "See, see. They know when to leave. Why aren't you guys leaving also?" he said as pork rinds were flying out of his mouth. More goodbyes were said as we watched them drive away. We all vowed to meet back here in a year. I think I heard Jethro screaming "NO, NO!" as Bambi pushed him inside the house.

He finally came back out and said "since you 3 are still here, we can go into Rapid and I can show you the Prepper Show that's in town. Then you can see what all of us South Dakotans do in our free time." I had to Google what a prepper was because it was entirely new to me.

After that I googled the show itself and what came up did look kind of interesting.

So off to Rapid we went with high hopes of finding us some prepper stuff. I made the comment that I saw on the Facebook admission prices were lowered from 10 to 5 dollars a person. Sweet. We paid our money and walked in to this.

This does not look like the picture they put out on the Facebook. What a bust. I said to Gladys that we need to pack up and leave tomorrow if this is the best they can do. I looked over at Jethro and he was smiling from ear to ear. I think that was his plan from the beginning.

Sunday 28 September 2025

We packed up and were ready to leave because our adventure was going to continue and it was going to be epic. We said our goodbyes, to Jethro, Bambi and Steve. (Why does Steve get to stay?) Hugs all around from everyone. Bambi whispered in my ear, rather pleaded "Don't leave, please don't leave. I want to smell normal people that don't smell of bourbon and pork rinds. I beg of you." 

We vowed to come back next year for the second annual "J Bar B Ranch get together and hootinanny."

On a more personal note. I make fun of Jim and Barb(mostly Jim) but they know that I am only kidding. We love them like family and we wanted to thank them from the bottom of our hearts for inviting us out for an entire week of friendship and fun and also great memories that we all shared. Barb made some amazing meals for all of us and Jim kept us entertained which I am sure was difficult at best. I almost feel sad for winning so much of their money. We can't wait to do it again next year.

Our adventure continues.










 



Wednesday, October 1, 2025

Part 3 of the J Bar B Ranch

 Wednesday 24 September 2025

As I awake after 4 days of drinking, confusion fills my head. Where am I? Who am I? Why do I smell pork rinds?  As I roll over Jethro's face greets me with a huge smile and a faint odor of bourbon. "WHAT THE......!" I start to yell but he cuts me off in mid sentence. "Gladys was in the house so I came out to see you and tell you about all of today's activities. Bambi was right, you do sleep naked." he said. After the shock wore off he filled me in with the day's activities. 

He said that we were going to take a beautiful drive through the Black Hills and then end up at Mt. Rushmore. After that he found a place that smokes the best ribs you will ever find. Then ending up back at the ranch for, you guessed it, bourbon tasting and games. I told him that it sounds great but why did he have to crawl into bed with me to tell me? He said he likes to cuddle.

After that awkward encounter we all got ready and headed to the bus stop. The route to Mt. Rushmore was going to be on the Iron Mountain Road. A 17 mile scenic route famous for its 314 curves, 14 switchbacks and three pigtail bridges that loop over themselves along with three granite tunnels that frame views of Mt. Rushmore. Once inside the busses we were off. 

The drive was spectacular. No one got car sick. Here are some images taken from the interweb. 

This is a pigtail.
One of the tunnels with the view of Mt. Rushmore.

In the back of the bus you just get the view of the back of Jethro's head.
I think he needs a haircut.

It was a very good ride though so we can't really complain. We got to Mt. Rushmore and it has been several years since we have been there. It is always breathtaking.
Mt Rushmore.

And in typical fashion everyone raced ahead of the cripple guy to get the best spot for viewing. All I got was the backs of everyone's heads.
L-R-Steve looking for the mountain, Debbie looking for chapstick, Leslie wondering why there are no Canadians on the mountain, Jethro thinks he sees a deer, Gladys pretending she's in handcuffs, Dave thinking that this is Crazy Horse, and Bambi wanting to be in handcuffs also.

I borrowed a picture from Jethro's blog of the entire group because I did not get one at all.
L-R-Debbie, Steve, Bambi, Dave, Jethro, Harry, Gladys, Leslie, Tango and Vicki. Why are we all wearing sunglasses? Do we think we are all famous and don't want to be recognized? LOL.

There is a hike that gets you closer to the mountain so a few of the group decided to do that. I was not one of them. So the remainder stayed back to explore the visitor center and gift shop, also to sit in the shade and enjoy the ambiance. With their return we headed out to our next destination. Elk Haven Horse Camp.
This was not far from Mt. Rushmore which was good, because we were getting hungry and thirsty. It is a working horse camp but the owner once a week will smoke ribs if you pre-order them. They were so good and one rack will feed two people. Get there early to get a table, which we did and we were able to enjoy some beers before the ribs. Like we haven't had any beer this week.
This picture does not do them justice but they were so good, Meat comas for everyone.

Moans and groans again could be heard from the group again. Some swearing that they vow never to eat again. Once back at the ranch alcohol was provided again. Bourbon tasting and what ever else you fancied. The dice games were brought out also and I think I won another shut the box game again which meant more cash again! We all stumbled off to bed with our pants undone. Another fabulous day in the books.

Thursday 25 September 2025

Five days of drinking. This reminds me of my military deployments. My military training is paying off.

"Tango. Tango." Jethro whispered into my ear. Note to self. Have Gladys lock the door when she leaves.

"What Jethro?" I sighed.

"These old people are tougher than I thought. No one has left yet. I'm starting to lose money now." he whimpered softly into my pillow. 

"Maybe you need to have them start drinking earlier." I said.

Just like that a light bulb went off in his head. "That's brilliant!" he said. "Hold my pork rinds while I set up a brewery tour today!"

Off we went to the breweries. One after another.
The gang. 

Fun fact for you. Did you know you can drink more if you get senior citizen discounts? Everyone except the Canadians. They still pay more. Sorry.
Fun fact here. This is Jim's second picture of the group not realizing that Harry was not in it until I asked where Harry was? So we waited for him to return and re took the photo. I got your back Harry. So many breweries later we ended up at the Lost Cabin Brewery. This is what I remember of it.
Kids in bars. Good times.

After that it was time to head back to the ranch. It was going to be a special night. Bambi's famous tacos for dinner. Mouth watering for sure. I know I went back for seconds. Again everyone was stuffed. Bourbons came out again along with more dice games. 

How many days has this been. It's all kind of a fog.

"Tanglo, Tanglo. It's me Jefro. Tom, Tom, Tom, the day after today is going to be the most stupendilicious day every." Jethro whispered into my ear after a long day of breweries and bourbon.

"Why is that?" I said.

"We are going to see the big fluffy cows!"